Welcome to my blog about raising a chile as a single Mom. I’ll make regular updates and provide lots of tips about single parenting. Visit bask soon to find out more!
Time Management For Single Moms – Getting The Help You Need
Being a single mom can be a very difficult situation to be in. You will have to battle with the situation of having too many things to do but having too little time to do those things. If you do not manage your time properly, things can easily get thrown out of order. So what do you do? Well, there are some things that you can do to greatly improve your situation. The following are some useful and proven suggestions:
Day Care Centers
Let us face it. As much as you want to be the one to tend to the needs of your little angels all the time, it is simply not possible. While it is important that you spend quality time with them, you also need to earn in order to afford daily and household expenses. And when you need to go to work, it is good to know that there are day care centers that you can count on.
Day care centers are especially useful if your children are still very young. If you cannot leave them in the house alone because they cannot take care of themselves yet, then you should start looking for a good day care center.
Enough Rest And Proper Nutrition
Most single moms find themselves lacking in sleep. They reason that having enough sleep is no longer possible because of the many things that they have to take care of. But think about this: if you do not sleep enough, then your efficiency will be reduced. Even if you do have more time to work in return for sacrificing your sleeping time, you will not be able to perform efficiently.
Another thing that single moms need is proper nutrition. This is because they are most likely to work harder and do overtime work more often. These things along with other stress factors can really take its toll on one’s health. Proper nutrition must be observed.
Community Groups And Counseling
Taking care of your body should not be your only concern. More than anything, you also have to take care of your mental health. Being a single mom is not easy and depression, anxiety, and stress can overcome you. To stay on track, it will help you to join and attend community groups for single moms and perhaps seek professional help as well if it becomes necessary.
In community groups for example, you will be able to meet other people who are also in a similar situation as you are. You will feel better knowing that you are not alone. Also, they will be able to give you ideas and tips on how to succeed in being a single mom.
Family And Friends
Because of the busy situation you are in, you may find less and less time to spend with your friends and family. However, this is the time that you need them the most. Your husband may no longer be there to help you raise your children, but your friends and family can. Do not shoulder everything alone. You can have people to help you with your situation.
How Children Learn – Books And Studies Are Not Everything
Drowning children in books, studies, and school is not a very good idea. In fact, you may be hindering a natural learning process. So how exactly should children learn? In this article, you will learn four important ways by which children improve their communication skills, socializing skills, reasoning skills, observation skills, intelligence, and others.
Especially during the early ages of a child, parents normally like to limit their child’s interaction with others to avoid the so-called ‘bad influence’. However, it is important that you allow your child to interact with others once in a while as it is a very important part of learning. With enough interaction, you are preventing your children from isolating themselves when they become older. They learn how to be around people and how to deal with them.
And by interacting with other people, your child also improves his communication skills. He gets to apply the words and manners of speech he has learned so far and he also begins to learn more words and way of speech by speaking with others.
Playing may seem all that – fun, and sometimes messy. But what you may not know is the important learning and development which is taking place as your child plays. This is true whether he is playing alone with his toys, or playing with other children as well.
For instance, playing alone with toys strengthens your child’s imagination and cognitive skills. With toys, he imagines scenes and event, and he also perceives the form, shape, use, and function of his different toys.
As for playing with others, it also imparts very important lessons to your child. He learns how fulfilling it is when other children share their toys with him. And as such, he also learns to share his toys with others. This will shape up the kind of person that he will become when he grows up.
Children have their own skillful ways to find things that will make them think, imagine, and perceive. But you also have to intervene in a lot of situations. You have to ‘stimulate’ them to think to lead them to the right way of learning.
For example, simply reading them a story book will not do. You have to ask questions. Ask them what they feel about certain characters and what they would have done if it was them. Of course, your child will have questions of his own so be prepared for that too. But you also have to ask them questions to make sure that they learn the main lesson of the story.
Another way to stimulate your child’s thinking capabilities is to use flash cards, puzzle games, and quiz games. These are now easily available in any toy store. They are a fun way for children to learn. Because it does not get boring for them, they just keep on learning thinking that they are just playing.
Take your child to places. Do not just let them stay at home playing and studying all day. They need to see the world! And no, it does not have to be Disney land, although that would be great. You can simply take them to the park, the shopping mall, and cities. If you need to go somewhere, take them with you if that is possible. You have no idea how eager they will be to see places, even your work office.
Importance of a Routine For Raising A Child
As a parent, it is important that you set routines and schedules which your children must follow. Of course, you also need to give them some freedom. But following a routine teaches them very important lessons in life. Here are some of them:
Children, especially those that are still in toddler stage, are mostly only concerned about the things that they like to do. They do not like to be bothered by routine and errands. But teaching them how to follow routines which you have set (meal times, sleeping times, play times, etc.) you are effectively teaching them the importance of discipline. They learn that there are some things that they need to do even if they do not like it. For example, discipline moved a child to brush his teeth before going to bed even if he does not like doing that.
Routines are normally repetitive in nature (same meal time, same sleeping time, etc.). And adhering to these schedules teaches your children how to be consistent. This is a very important aspect which will come in handy once they begin going to school. It will also help them become a better person when they become adults. It is also a quality which other people will admire about them. They will shine in school, work, and other groups they will belong to.
Being there on time for a scheduled routine is not exactly easy especially for children. But if you are firm about implementing the schedules which you have set, your children will know how to adjust their activities in order to be there for a scheduled routine. For example, you may observe later on that they will leave play time early in order to be there on time for lunch. They will learn to respect the importance of being punctual which is a very important lesson.
Adhering to routines and schedules which you have set will require obedience on the part of your children. They will learn that rules and conditions are there for a reason, and that it is good for them. If you impart this important aspect to them at an early age, it will be easier for you to guide them as they grow up. Especially when they become teens, they will most likely listen to you when you tell them which things they are allowed to do and which things they should not do.
As you are teaching your children to adhere to daily routines, you are actually teaching them how to be independent. Once the important routines you taught them have been etched into their hearts, they will follow them to their adult age. Even if you are not around, they will know when to eat, when to go to sleep, when to do the dishes, the laundry, and such things.
And most importantly, they will learn how to respect you. This is the basis of why they learn to be obedient to the routines which you have set – because they respect you. They know that the things you are doing are only for your own good.
Children Learning Speeds – Cognition, Reflex, Coordination
Parents are proud of their children no matter what. But it is a lot more fulfilling if parents see their children becoming skilled in many aspect. And one basis of skill is speed. And speed encompasses three important aspects – cognition, reflex, and coordination. The following are concise description of the three and they can be achieved:
Cognition – Quick Thinking
The ability to think fast is something that you will want your children to develop at early age. The faster their cognitive skills develop, the faster they will learn new things and absorb more knowledge. So how do you teach your children how to become quick thinkers?
Mental stimulation is one way to do it. You do this by engaging them in mental games which are designed to encourage them to think fast. Good examples include flash cards, math games, quiz games, guessing games, and such. It stimulates their brain become more active.
Another way is to make sure that they get proper nutrition. DHA is one popular ingredient which commercial milk products advertise. It is said to improve the cognitive skills of growing children. Aside from this, make sure that they get a balanced diet from all food groups.
Reflex – Quick Action
Cognitive skills are all about thinking. Reflex on the other hand is about motor skills. It is the ability of the body to move fast and efficiently. This is an important quality which children learn by engaging in physical activities.
This is why it is important that you allow your children some play time. Let them play with other children and perhaps engage in games as well. They can learn ball games or they can learn to swim. Also, improving their motor skills this way will improve their overall health. They will be able to get the exercise that they need.
It will help them develop stronger bones, stronger muscles, and stronger immune system. Although of course, engaging in physical activities also exposes them to dangers such as injury and infection. Be sure to be on the watch.
Coordination – Application Of The Two
This is a combination of the two – cognitive skills and reflex. It is the ability of the mind and body to act as one. It enhances the communication between the mind and the body. Take a look at a pianist for example. The coordination appears as follows: the eyes read the notes, the mind perceives the notes, the mind then commands the hands, the hands move to play the keys of the piano, the ears hear the notes, and the mind perceives the music produced.
Without good coordination, such a skill will not be possible. And the better the coordination ability is, the more skillful your child will be in activities such as playing the piano. Coordination also occurs in many other activities such as typing using a computer. The application is really wide and varied.
So how do you teach your child coordination skills? Games that require children to do some action after hearing or reading a command are good coordination games. For example, computer games like Dance Revo requires a lot of coordination skill. But of course, you have to watch their habits when playing games as addiction is a possibility.
Why it’s so important to spend time with your child?
In the modern world, most parents are too busy with work and other things. As a result, they may begin to sacrifice some of their time with their children. But this is not healthy. Spending time with your children has more benefits that you may think. Some of the most important include the following:
Problems can arise if there is no open communication between parent and child. This is because parents will not get to properly monitor what is happening to their children. Children may already be going through problems and difficulties such as bullying at school, struggle with grades, harassment, and a multitude of other things. But because they do not feel at ease telling their parents, the problem may have already bloated before parents learn about it.
So how do you establish open communication with your child? Spending time with them is one way. You have to make them feel that you are always there for them. If you are always preoccupied with other things, they will conclude that you do not care what is happening to them. In time, they will stop telling you things.
Even if you are busy, you should at least dedicate some time with them before the day ends. Ask them about the things that happened at school. Ask them what they felt about it. This way, they will know that you are always willing to listen and give advice. But avoid smothering them or scolding them regarding what they told you. If you do, they will be hesitant to tell you anything next time.
If you always dedicate time to spend with your children, they will feel loved and cared for. And because they know that you are always there for them, they will develop a strong trust for you. This is very important because trust will be the basis of a good and harmonious relationship between you and your child.
It is important that you impart this to them at a very young age so when they become teenagers, they will always listen to what you have to say. When you tell them ‘you cannot do this, you cannot do that’, they are likely to obey given that you give them a good reason which they can relate to. They will be obedient because they learned to trust you. They learned that whatever you say and do is for their well-being.
It is a natural thing for children to idolize and admire their parents – a young boy to his father, and a young girl to his mother. This is because children see them as ‘perfect’. They marvel at the qualities of their parents – a young boy admires the strength, skill, and dominant qualities of his father and a young girl admires the beauty, elegance, and style of her mother.
But this astonishment can diminish if your children rarely see you. Instead, they may begin to see someone else – perhaps an older friend, a brother/sister, or uncle/aunt. As a result, they may begin to trust those people more than they trust you. This can lead to disobedience.
Therefore, it is important that you always spend time with your children. And as you do, make sure that you show them good qualities which they can admire.